Becoming a Learner-Achiever
Hello, and greetings from London!
We’re on honeymoon headed for Greece! And here I am using plane rides and flight delays as writing time for you, my dear foxes. This is the perfect time to explain my methods for furthering foxy dreams while fulfilling obligations.
You’re right, honeymooning is not an obligation, but the plane ride - and unfortunate delay - to get to Greece, is! And when I’m not on vacation, my days are filled with fulfilling duties that arise in the natural course of being human, just like you.
A couple of weeks ago, we wrapped up our decision-making series with a chat about the positive decision loop. If you need a refresher or you’re a new fox, you can learn more about the positive decision loop on my new blog! 😊 Essentially, actively deciding our lives sends us into a positive life progression in which we have the time, energy, and ability to achieve our dreams. As we grow, we achieve our goals and create new dreams, and we become capable of achieving those too.
Now the question is, how can we fuel progress on our foxy dreams when we are tied up with obligations that arise from work, family, and life generally. How can we grow when our time, energy, and focus are dedicated to others’ projects instead of our own?
The answer is, by adopting a learner-achiever’s perspective. Yes, I’m coining new terms. It is foxy to create our own solutions to manifest the life we want to live. And that is exactly what we are doing now. If we approach every duty as an opportunity to learn something and/or to achieve something, we naturally fuel the positive decision loop as we make each endeavor our own.
Here I am, living a prime example. 5-hour flight delay on (not so) EasyJet. It would be easy to let the delay, and even the flight itself, feel like time that isn’t mine. I’m not yet in Greece, so it doesn’t feel like I’m on vacation. Airports and airplanes are uncomfortable and grimy. It feels like I’m trapped in limbo as I await transportation to my final destination. Working, attending meetings, sitting in traffic, doing chores, etc., can elicit the same feelings. We are not where we want to be, not doing what we want to do, but we are required or feel obligated to suffer the situation. Ugggghhhhhh.
Let’s turn that perspective on its head. Let’s reclaim our lives. There is no need to suffer. Instead, let’s treat each task, obstacle, and obligation as an endeavor of our own. When we own our circumstances, chosen or otherwise, we can manipulate the time and situation into serving our foxy goals. Here’s my 2-step formula for becoming a learner-achiever. Step 1: reframe. Step 2: reform.
Step 1: Reframe
When we feel we are bound to spend time on obligations, we allow ourselves to become victims of circumstance. Perspective is a choice. If we decide there is no such thing as wasted time, every moment becomes an opportunity to learn or achieve. So let’s look at the situation a different way and recover all time as our own.
To seize every moment as an opportunity requires that we be honest with ourselves about our true limitations. A flight delay binds our bodies to a particular location, but does not have to inhibit or occupy our mood, attention, focus, or ability to achieve other tasks, like writing this newsletter, or relaxing over a beer. I happen to be doing both at the same time. Cheers to the power of reframing!🍻
Even where circumstances place greater limits, we can use the time and our attention to enhance and develop skills and relationships. Here’s a common example: work meetings. Work meetings often suck. Running an efficient and productive meeting is a skill that many have yet to develop, and we all suffer the consequences, facilitators and attendees alike. But even when our bodies and attention are bound, we can use the circumstances to work on important skills such as active listening, asking good questions, and giving feedback. Utilizing these skills can enhance bonds with co-workers, inspire team engagement, improve project understanding, and facilitate completion of the meeting. In addition, others learn to trust our work because they have experienced our foxy perspective and work ethic.
For me, like work meetings, attending law school classes totally sucked... until I reframed and reformed. Traditionally, law classes consist of dreadfully boring lecture, and forced recitation of case law from the students. Most of my professors were like Charlie Brown's teacher in Peanuts - wah-wah, wah-wah, wah-wah. What a waste of time! I considered ditching to use my time more productively, but attendance was mandatory with penalties. However, I refused to accept this status quo. First, I tried to change the attendance policy with the administration. When that didn’t work (U.S. News law school rankings take into account student attendance rates), I reframed my perspective on attending class, and reformed it into a game.
The game was, how much could I get everyone else in class to talk about the law? Could I avoid the monotonous lecture and fact recitation entirely and stimulate conversation instead? Policy debates, oh what jolly fun! 🤓 I worked on my questioning skills and prepared for debate. And every class became an hour or two gathered with a professor and students who otherwise would have no reason to converse in this manner. Solving my boredom and attendance problems also gave me the collateral bonuses of further developing my legal knowledge, and sharpening my skills of listening, questioning, and persuasion. I was also solicited to be on teams for group projects and extra-curricular activities because people were familiar with my attitude, preparation, and thought-process. Reframing for the win!
What’s super cool is that reframing is possible in every situation. And once we start, it swiftly becomes a way of life. The status quo is only what it is because we have yet to interrupt it. We reframe in order to distinguish actual limitations from perceived limitations, and become empowered to make changes.
Step 2: Reform
Being foxy requires action. Action to make decisions, to make progress, to achieve our goals and live out our dreams. Once we reframe, we can move from passive to active in order to reform the status quo. Let’s reform our lives to serve our foxy dreams.
Are you a furniture-mover, like I am? I like to rearrange my physical environment to facilitate creativity, comfort, and purpose. Manipulating my environment enables me to understand its limitations and my preferences. Different tasks require different workflows, lighting, seating, etc. The same goes for other kinds of tasks and even relationships.
Test the waters, figure out what works for you (and your relationships), and adjust your methods, environment, and approach accordingly. Take the time to consider what burdens and benefits your workflow, your life. Then, remove or alter the burdens, and fuel the benefits. This includes people too.
I understand that not all limitations and burdens are immediately removable. No worries at all. There’s plenty to do within the confines of practicality! While still fulfilling our duties, we can grow working relationships, practice good posture, hydrate, develop better listening skills, or do anything else that would serve our goals in addition to our obligations. Now that’s some foxy multitasking! 🦊
Even a simple injection of positivity can do wonders. Attitude is contagious, my foxes.
My favorite reform is to trust. To trust that trying the alternatives is worthwhile. Now or in the future. Trust that developing skills will serve us, now and in the future. Even when we are uncertain of the results of our efforts, trust that every task, every effort, every skill, will serve us somehow. Trust, and we immediately become able to reclaim our lives, because every endeavor becomes an experience that leads to learning and growth.
As learner-achievers, we can be dutiful and purposeful at the same time. Experience, skills, and relationships are all necessary and beneficial in the pursuit of our dreams. At the very least, they facilitate decision-making and inspire confidence. Win-win, double-win. Infinite, untold future wins.
Let’s invest in ourselves and become learner-achievers. We can become rich in our ability to grow while fulfilling our obligations. We can improve our performance and simultaneously improve ourselves. Let’s reframe and reform, fuel that positive decision loop, and reap the rewards of foxy investing. I’m here for you. Send me an email, write a comment on my blog, and let me know what I can do to help.
Three cheers for my lovely foxes,
“You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.”
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